Honest Worship

“In every season of my soul, teach my heart to sing.”

– Amanda Cook

It’s one of those moments. One of those days. One of those seasons.

We have this thing, God and I. Where we say what we mean and mean what we say.

I can’t pretend to be thankful when we both know I’m anything but.

Frustrated. Angry. Tired. Sad.

If we’re going to talk about my feelings then those adjectives are far more fitting.

But I’m supposed to be thankful.

In all things give thanks.

Not some things. All things.

How do I give thanks in this? THIS?

I know the truth of worship. Praising through the hard. But right now it feels like foreign concept way out of my reach.

“I want to be thankful. I really do. But I don’t know how. Not in this…”

“Why do you still turn to Me when it gets hard?”

“Because you’re God…you have a way of working things out for my good…even when the process royally sucks.”

“Remember that conversation we had about worship the other day?”

“The one where worship comes down to acknowledging Your sovereignty…acknowledging You’re God? Wait…that…this…this is worship….”

“Precisely. Every time you make the choice to turn to Me when it gets hard you’re acknowledging that I am still God in your life. You’re elevating Me above what you’re going through. Worship doesn’t look the same all the time. I don’t expect you to laugh when you’re in pain. Your act of trust in itself is an act of worship.”

Hmmm…and wouldn’t you know it…I now have something I can give thanks for….honestly.

For every moment You come through for me in the most unexpected ways, thank You Holy Spirit. 🙂

Christianity Scrapbook

Scrapbook #1: Life

“What you must realize, what you must come to praise, is the fact that there is no right way that is going to become apparent to you once and for all. The most blinding illumination that strikes and perhaps radically changes your life will be so attenuated and obscured by doubts and dailiness that you may one day come to suspect the truth of that moment at all. The calling that seemed so clear will be lost in echoes of questionings and indecision; the church that seems to save you will fester with egos, complacencies, banalities; the deepest love of your life will work itself out like a thorn in your heart until all you can think of is plucking it out. Wisdom is accepting the truth of this. Courage is persisting with life in spite of it. And faith is finding yourself, in the deepest part of your soul, in the very heart of who you are, moved to praise it.”

– Christian Wiman (My Bright Abyss)

  1. That startling moment when the words of a complete stranger are a perfect description of your own life. If I was to sum up what I’ve learned about life so far, it would be this.
  2. I have so many of these moments.
  3. I collect them privately so I figured I may as well post some of them here under Scrapbook…with a few of my thoughts on them.
  4. Expect many many more.